My Tarot Origin Story

 

My Humble Beginnings

I got interested in reading tarot when I was 16 years old. I had always been curious about psychics and psychic abilities. I sort of believed, sort of didn't. My curiosity piqued in the early ought when late night infomercials (commercial advertising products or services with an audience), of Miss Cleo and the Psychic Friends Network kept airing.

I was dating someone online at the time. We hadn't met in person and things were pretty rocky between us. I received an offer to try a psychic reading from Miss Cleo herself FOR FREE. So I dialed the number, got connected with someone that wasn't Miss Cleo. I told her about my internet boyfriend at the time.  She predicted we would be together and we would be very happy. He even thought about marrying me!

Now mind you, I was 16, and I didn't ask for parental permission! LAWSUIT! Anyway, this "psychic" kept me on the phone for three hours. And I ran up a $300 phone bill. Luckily, my dad contested the charges and said I was underage and did not have his or my mom's permission to call the hotline. My dad wasn't the only one that had this happened. It happened to thousands of families across the United States with minors calling the Psychic Friends Network and running up their parents' phone bills without parental permission. The Psychic Friends Network were taken to court, and I believe they settled out of court.

Now, this "reading" I got from the "psychic" proved to be false. Me and the internet boyfriend broke up. He ended up dating my best friend Tiffany, and it caused a huge fight between us.  I was depressed and heartbroken. Luckily, my step-grandmother, Karen, heard about what happened with me an the alleged psychic.

"I can read your tarot cards! Didn't you know I read tarot, silly girl?" my step-grandma asked me.
She took me inside her house and we went into her kitchen. She got out her Mythic Tarot deck and shuffled the cards. She then fanned out the cards and had me select from left to right, no going back, ten cards. She then read the cards and the cards meanings out of her guidebook.

What I remember distinctly from my first actual tarot reading was I drew The Moon and The Star. My grandma said I was going through a phase and that things will be okay. And she said she saw all my wishes coming true and I would feel happy and be at peace.

Grandma ended up being right. Even thought the reading from what I remember was vague and cookie-cutter, it ended up being a better prediction than the "fake psychic". My grandma ended up becoming my tarot teacher.  She and I would have tarot reading sessions from when I was 18 years old and got my first official tarot deck, until I was 36 years old and she could no longer see the cards clearly. Our tarot reading sessions comprised each of us taking turns to read our cards, and then we would get Parmesan Bread Bites and pizza from Domino's. Sometimes swimming in her gigantic, Olympic-sized pool would also happen and then we would read cards.  It was how we bonded as step-granddaughter and step-grandmother, or rather granddaughter and grandmother.

Going Pro

In 2006, I started toying with the notion of going pro. I bought an astrology reading from a famous astrologer. She told me I was meant to teach tarot, as well as be a tarot reader. In 2007, I started a website and went pro. I believe my first business was called Samantha's Readings. I did e-mail readings. I didn't offer in-person readings at the time because I had no where to perform my readings at. 

At the time, I was the famous astrologer's "fan club president". I would do the psychic fairs and have people sign up for the astrologer's newsletter. She didn't give me the chance to read at her fairs until 2009, after I lost my corporate job because of the economic recession. 

From 2009 until March 2010, I would do in-person tarot readings at her fairs, her conventions, and even traveled to New Orleans to read at an event she was having.  Things were going great. I was breaking even most of the time. I even had a gig to teach about tarot and the law of attraction at her upcoming convention she was having. But in March 2010, I had to step back.

I had to step back and focus on my mental health. I had a severe psychosis breakdown. I didn't know who I was or even what year it was. I thought it was 2012 and I was in a concentration camp.  Doctors admitted me to the hospital for two weeks. I went to a psychiatrist and told her about how I was into the New Age and did tarot and oracle readings.

"Throw out your Doreen Virtue decks and stay away from reading tarot for now. We need you to focus on YOU", the psychiatrist ordered.

So I stepped away from my growing business and the famous astrologer and pretty much everyone that associated with the new age and the community that this famous astrologer had. I stepped away from reading tarot for myself. My parents put my decks and my new age self-help books up in the attic.  

Around September 2010, my 26th birthday, I felt like pre-psychosis Samantha. I asked my parents if I could have my tarot decks and books back.

"Only if you get on some sort of health insurance and stay away from the astrologer and her community", my dad replied. My mom agreed with him.

So I continued to focus on getting myself back even more and looked into getting on county medical insurance, since my COBRA insurance coverage from my job was ending. 

In 2013, I was back to my pre-psychosis self. I was attending therapy, I had insurance, and I was taking my medication religiously. I rebranded and relaunch my tarot business. I also had landed my dream job at a specialty pharmacy as a prior authorization specialist. So I bought a domain and called my business Entertaining & Enlightening. Once again, I did e-mail only readings. 

This time around, my business struggled financially. In 2016, I gave up my domain and quit the business. I also felt like I wasn't ready to be a tarot reader professionally.  I had a lot of severe imposter syndrome.

Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

In May 2020, I lost my part-time job as a data entry clerk at a collection agency because of the COVID pandemic. The owner of the business also sold the company and laid everyone off. I started toying with the idea that I could do readings again. And this time, I felt ready. I had posted on Instagram monthly readings and they got a lot of likes. So in October 2020, I got my domain, sammybrite dot com. And in December 2020, I registered for my LLC (the LLC which Queen of Swords Insights is under). By January 8, 2021, I was ready and open for business.

I struggled a lot with imposter syndrome in my first three years of being Tarot By SammyBrite LLC. I was jealous of other readers, who in my mind were booking the clients like crazy. I also felt like my readings were not what people wanted. While the imposter syndrome was not as severe as it was from 2013 to 2021, it was still there. And it held me back a lot.

I offered in-person readings in 2022, after doing a psychic fair every month at a local indie used bookstore. There was a demand for in-person readings in my city and county. So I answered the calling.

I don't think I overcame imposter syndrome yet. It occasionally pops up when I want to offer a new service or if a reading didn't land with someone the way I had hoped it would. But the imposter syndrome isn't as dark as it used to be. I'm proud of the work I've put in to overcoming imposter syndrome and reading tarot professionally. While I'm not where I want to be, I"m a lot further of where I want to be. And it's only the beginning!

Beginner, Intermediate, or Advanced?

I would say I am an intermediate skilled tarot reader nowadays. I know pretty much all the traditional meanings, and I keep learning new ways to interpret the cards and different perspectives. I'm currently studying the astrological meanings in the cards. I recently learned that the Queen of Swords is my day of birth court card.  I continue to take classes, read books, and listen to podcasts based on the tarot. An Advanced tarot reader to me is someone who is a tarot scholar or tarot master, like Mary K. Greer or Rachel Pollack. While I don't have intentions to become a tarot scholar or a tarot master, I am comfortable with where I am at in my journey. Rebranding as the Queen of Swords Insights under my Tarot By SammyBrite LLC. And I hope to embody the Queen of Swords in my readings. 

Five Things I Wish I Knew About Reading Tarot Sooner

Here are five things I wish I knew sooner about reading tarot & tarot reading professionally.

1. You don't have to be psychic, or a witch to read tarot. Atheists and agnostics read tarot. "Normal" people read tarot. People who aren't interested in learning to be psychic or who have no interested in developing their sixth sense read tarot. Fortune tellers and psychic mediums don't have exclusive use of Tarot. 
2. You don't have to use a tarot spread. Especially if you are a beginner. It's best to start out reading 1-3 cards. And read them as if you were telling a story. Allow predictions to come at a later date in your studies. Get acquainted with the traditional meanings and expand into intuitive reading. Tarot spreads can be complex and intimidating for some beginning tarot readers. Sometimes all you need is a one card pull, three card pull max.
3. The internet is full of resources. USE IT! The Internet is your friend. Use the resources available. A few websites I like are Biddy Tarot for card meanings, Daily Tarot Girl for tarot spreads and prompts, and Pinterest for tarot spreads. I also like using ChatGPT to give practice readings and to help me create my own tarot spreads or journaling prompts for the cards I draw in my own readings. I DO NOT USE CHATGPT TO DO PROFESSIONAL, PAID READINGS! THAT IS LAZY AND UNETHICAL!
4. The only way you get better is by practice. Practice with strangers! Go sit out at a cafe with your deck and do free readings or readings for tips or donations. Join tarot enthusiast groups on Facebook and practice with the members (if it is okay to do so). Don't just practice with friends and family. Get out there and read strangers!
5. There is so much to tarot than just fortune telling. Tarot is a mirror and can reflect our current reality. It can be a self-help tool. It can help jumpstart your creativity (especially if you're a writer!).  Tarot has many uses beyond fortune telling. 

And here's a bonus!

This is for the tarot professionals who aren't psychic: You are not a sideshow magician. It is okay for you to strike up a conversation with the querent. Don't pretend to be psychic or all-knowing or all-seeing. Ask for clarity,  ask the client if the reading resonates, and let the client talk! You are not a mind reader either. Tarot is a conversation, not just a stage trick. If you are not advertising you're psychic, then it's perfectly okay to talk to the querent and ask them to go into detail or if the reading resonates, or give feedback.